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By mid-October, it was finally time to bring the plant inside. Evans’ words had stuck with me, and I’d followed his advice and picked up a cheap hygrometer to keep track of the humidity inside the drying room and later inside the jar.

The Charlie Brown weed tree did not bear as much fruit as I’d hoped. In fact, it all fit inside one mason jar, but it was something, and that was enough. I strung up some lines under the ceiling in my home office and then turned to the plant, which, now standing inside our apartment, felt larger and stronger than ever before. 

Chopping off that first branch was akin to putting a pet down. It hurt. A lot. I had shared so much time with it and cared about it. I had even played it music on occasion, remembering from my youth how a local farmer told me he kept his radio on for his cows because it soothed them and they produced more milk. I figured it couldn’t hurt.Finally, after sitting next to it with scissors in hand for what felt like hours, I made the first snip.

It hung from the ceiling for just under a week and then cured in the jar for a few more. 

I spread the trimming across a few days, which became its own meditative task. The buds felt soft and squishy between my fingers, they bounced back after a slight squeeze, and the smell was musty and earthy but also bright and fruity with strong whiffs of pine, like I was walking through a conifer forest inside my living room.

The smell of the plant, in my opinion, remains the best part. The smoke is not the smoothest, it’s not the best-tasting bud, but it’s potent enough. Or maybe that’s just my own reaction because I grew it. Love has a way of papering over flaws. 

Here is another thing I learned: it’s easy to grow bad weed. Good weed, though, takes a lot more patience. Growth takes time and persistence. 

Next summer, I will give it another shot. And if you’re thinking about trying to grow your own plant for the first time, my recommendation is to dive in.

Most likely, it will bring some joy to your life. And if you’re lucky, you might even get some weed out of it. 

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