Humor

Man Feels Like He Can’t Breathe With Mask Wadded Up In Mouth

More from G/O Media ‘And These Are My Nobel Peace Prizes,’ Says Trump, Gesturing Toward Room Of Plastic Trophies Who Said It: Kanye West Or An Instruction Manual For The Cuisinart CRC-400 Electric Rice Cooker? Mariners Place Kyle Lewis On IL After Losing Him In Thick Outfield Smog Pope Francis Gets Self Thrown Into Hell As Part Of Plot To Take Down High-Level Demon Ring ShareThis post was originally published on this site

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Effects Of Future Climate Change Migration

The rise of massive annual wildfires and hurricanes around the U.S. has shone a spotlight on whether certain areas of the country will be habitable in the future, a reality that would reshape America in many ways. The Onion looks at the effects of future climate change migration. Read more… ShareThis post was originally published on this site

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Scientists Study Brains Of Baseball Fans To Find Out How They Stay Interested During First 7 Innings

SEATTLE—Revealing that the mystery has baffled scientists for the past hundred years, researchers at the University of Washington announced Friday that they have been studying the brains of select baseball fans to discover how they manage to stay interested throughout the first seven innings. “Although we have been… Read more… ShareThis post was originally published on this site

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Cool Dog Doesn't Give A Shit About Other Dog Passing Him On Sidewalk

More from G/O Media Conservative Evangelical Asks God To Give Her Strength To Incorporate Forced Hysterectomies Into Belief System Smoke From California Wildfires Creates Hazy Skies Nationwide ‘And These Are My Nobel Peace Prizes,’ Says Trump, Gesturing Toward Room Of Plastic Trophies Pope Francis Gets Self Thrown Into Hell As Part Of Plot To Take Down High-Level Demon Ring ShareThis post was originally published on this site

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Couple Thankfully Not Well-Liked Enough To Have Superspreader Wedding

PORTSMOUTH, NH—Following the bride-and-groom-to-be’s decision to celebrate their union with loved ones despite the ongoing pandemic, sources reported Thursday that local couple Caitlin Hughes and Thomas Radke were thankfully not well-liked enough for their wedding to become a superspreader event. “At first, I thought… Read more… ShareThis post was originally published on this site

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ICE Responds To Public Outcry By Pledging All Detainees Will Receive Lobotomy To Erase Trauma

More from G/O Media LeBron Finally Reaches Western Conference Finals After 17 Seasons In League Woman Just Wants To Date Guy Who Can Make Her Laugh, Like Cartman ‘And These Are My Nobel Peace Prizes,’ Says Trump, Gesturing Toward Room Of Plastic Trophies Quiet City Streets Allow Neighborhood Residents To Hear The Natural Sounds Of Couples’ Blow-Out Fights ShareThis post was originally published on this site

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Exasperated Plumber Explains To Kanye West Why Flushing Awards Bad For Toilet

CALABASAS, CA—Reaching into the multi-platinum artist’s overflowing pipes and pulling out several feces-and-toilet-paper-covered trophies, exasperated local plumber Larry DeGroot explained to Kanye West Thursday why flushing large metal awards was bad for his toilet. “Well, I think I found the problem, and that… Read more… ShareThis post was originally published on this site

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